Don’t Breathe (2016)

“It’s kind of fucked up to rob a blind guy, isn’t it?”

What’s it about?

Three thieves try to rob a blind guy in his own home thinking he’ll give it up easy but turns out, he’s not that kinda girl.

Who’s in it?

The bad guy from Avatar and the girl from Evil Dead.

Why should I watch it?

+ Like the title suggest, you actually do really hold your breath at some points in the movie
+ It gets fucking tense man! Will have you covering your mouth with both hands
+ Especially when he’s walking around the hallway and they’re trying to stay still
+ Lights out scene was awesome, liked the zoom shots to the face
+ Title also opens doors for some great puns, I like a good pun
+ It’s interesting how it makes you unsure who to root for
+ Both sides have bad and good qualities
+ On one hand this guy is blind and a grieving father and on the other, he’s hiding some dark shit
+ On one hand this girl is selfish as fuck and uses people but on the other, she’s just trying to create a better life for herself and her sister
+ They’re both pretty shitty people but one is clearly worse than the other
+ So, it’s a bit like choosing the next President of America
+ Stephen Lang was great at acting blind, he’s a pretty dangerous dude too once he’s at arms reach
+ He’s a better shot than a Stormtrooper
+ Blind aspect brings a layer of unpredictability as well, which makes it even more scarier and intense
+ Like you don’t know whether he’ll shoot or not etc.
+ That dog is like a fucking terminator
+ What is he feeding that thing?
+ The friendzone can be dangerous to your health
+ Movie made me jump twice
+ I’m talking about popcorn spilling everywhere jump
+ Unlike the Army vet, justice isn’t really blind, is it?
+ Rich people getting away with murder, or to be even more relevant, a certain Stanford athlete only spending 3 fucking months in prison after raping someone
+ If you think about it, he kinda turns into the person he hates in the end
+ Breaks the common misconception that blind people can’t be psychopaths

Why shouldn’t I watch it?

– Why did they cut the “Now you see what I see” line from the trailer?
– That was a badass line
– If you call yourself Money, you deserve to be shot (Relax, relax. It was in the trailer)
– If she’s missing, wouldn’t this guy be the number fucking one suspect?
– How the fuck did he even kidnap her anyway?
– Did he use his surprisingly strong sense of smell all the way to her house?
– Did he drag her all the way back to his? I’m guessing he can’t drive, right?
– All that turkey baster stuff came out of nowhere, wasn’t expecting that
– Someone should really introduce this guy to a little process called adoption
– Would be much easier than jizzing on people
– Holy shit, that kid does not stop talking about the fucking beach
– Is he living on a street full of deaf people?

Anything else?

Fresh movie with an interesting concept that explores new territories. Really entertaining throughout. Had a couple of what the fuck moments and stuff I didn’t see coming near the end but solid film regardless. Between this and Hush, it seems like loss of senses makes for great horror/thriller. Someone get writing on a film about someone who can’t smell or can’t taste anything.

8/10

You might also like:
Hush
Evil Dead
10 Cloverfield Lane